I’m getting married this year to a pretty terrific guy. And the wedding is not your typical white wedding: no white dress, no penguin suit, no bridal party, no church, no diamond ring, no white cake… you get the idea. But when my beloved said he wanted to wear a Tuxedo T-Shirt to our nuptials, I had to say, “Oh, hell no.”
There’s a lot of debate between him and I about dressing up for occasions. Should someone wear clothes they would otherwise not even have in their closet if they feel like they must, out of respect? I say yes. He says… NO! It’s a tricky situation. He wants to be himself. He doesn’t wear dress pants and dress shoes, ties or tucked-in shirts. And he has more respect for other people (truly) than some others who make the gesture of respect in appearance but don’t act with the same respect through their words and actions. And of course there is the question, what is it going to hurt to put on a dress outfit to show that person you care about their important day or event? His question is, how is it really hurting that person to let their friend/colleague be himself?
So the question is, do you conform to society’s rules–even if it makes your stomach turn–to show respect? Or do you be yourself through and through and be respectful in all the other ways that seem to matter the most?
© Be Nice. Creator and Be Nice.(somethingsonice.wordpress.com), 2009.